I have mentioned this particular 'habit', or 'coping strategy' before. It is the idea that when I feel awful, I take the time to make myself feel beautiful, and it helps me get through the day.
Think about it... Let's say you have a simple sore throat. If you stay in pajamas, don't do your hair, and feel gross as well as sick, the likelihood of you getting up, getting moving, being productive, or even leaving the house is pretty slim. BUT, if you take the time to do your hair, do your makeup, maybe put on a new shirt you haven't worn yet or a nice pair of pants that always make you feel pretty, maybe it will motivate you to be more productive.
This is one of my favorite habits. This habit soon became a routine in my younger years when I HAD to find a way to force myself to go to class, to go to work, to go to that social gathering that I had been looking forward to for weeks, etc... It had become a routine that I do NOT leave the house unless I feel beautiful. But over the last few years, I've been leaving the house less and less - for various reasons.
Well - I am bringing back this habit. Today I have nowhere to be, most of the housework is already finished, and the weather is awful. Sounds like a pajama day right? Nope! I got up, got into jeans, curled my hair, and did my makeup. I feel like a million bucks on the outside... I feel like total sh*t on the inside. I can feel my body getting worse and worse over the past few days... Another vomiting fit is threatening... And none of my pain meds even remotely help the sharp, debilitating stomach pain I've been having. But I feel beautiful and I still have a smile on my face. So what does this mean?
Selfie!!!
Okay okay, I know that this whole topic of 'selfies' has been very much criticized... And really, it is very much based upon narcissism/vanity. So why do I take so many selfies?
1. I like to commemorate days that I have powered through with a smile even when I feel like death.
2. I don't have a significant other to take pictures with at home.
3. I want to remember, I want my family to know and remember, I want my friends to know and remember, that despite all of the struggles, I am very happy.
I may not have the energy to go out all the time.. But I do have the energy to put effort into my outward appearance and to make myself feel like being productive.
So I'm bringing an old habit back, and going to try and make sure that I make an effort every single day - no matter how awful I am feeling, no matter if I am going to lie in bed all day, no matter if I cannot eat... I don't have to feel awful and LOOK awful too!
So here's a selfie from today.
Just because.
😊