We have now been ❤MARRIED❤ for four and a half days and it is amaaaazing.
Even with all of the hiccups, all of the pain, all of the fallout, the weekend was actually perfect.
At one point during the reception, someone asked how I was feeling, and my response was:
"Horrible, but I am blissfully happy, so f*ck it!".
I was smiling all day, but I cannot lie and pretend as though it wasn't affecting me health-wise. Any big day affects me, and this was the biggest and absolute best day of my life - of course it's going to wreak havoc on my system. Every second I have spent in pain, every cent we spent, every meltdown and sleepless night, ALL of it was worth it.
So we get up to Jasper on the Thursday in the afternoon. I wanted a lot of time to rest and relax at the hotel after the long drive. I wanted to be well-rested for the full weekend of activities. The drive in the mountains was gorgeous - some Autumn colours - and our pup took to the room right away (I'm sure it helps that he has been there before - in the very next room to last time) - but the altitude change tends to be a tiny trigger for HAE. I didn't notice anything, but we know that it occurs. That night I wanted to go for a short swim. The pool there has a lot of salt, so a little less chlorine, so I can usually spend about 20 minutes before I start reacting, and when I am in the water, my pain seems to melt away. I am not sure if it's the pressure being removed or what, but it works, every time.
The rest of the night was full of room service and relaxation.
That didn't exactly hold off a full-blown episode.
I was very emotional and stressed and excited... so around 1-2am, I felt the throat tickle. It wasn't severe, it wasn't even moderate, but it was there. By the time I woke up to take my morning meds at 8am, my voice had changed, my vocal cords were affected, I vomited for about 15 minutes, and I started having tiny, mild stridor breath sounds.
Time to go in.
We thought about waiting a bit... but we had a busy day ahead of us too, so we thought we should go early. I had called Jasper hospital a month before, explaining the situation and asking if they would be able to treat me, and it was still a big question mark. There was a chance they could say no and send me to Hinton. There was a chance they could say it was too serious and airlift me to Edmonton. We didn't want to take any chances.
Turns out, the hospital at Jasper was incredible. The nurses were amazing, the doctor was great, and even though I am not positive they believed me entirely at first, they treated me as though they did, and then realized later on how serious it could have gotten. Once my voice came back after treatment it was obvious from the massive difference in my voice and breathing.
The IV treatment worked wonders, and since they had to monitor me for about half an hour afterwards, they offered to give me some IV fluids!! So I left the hospital with better breath, my normal voice, and rehydrated. We also still had time to rest for a couple of hours before going to rehearsal and to set up the Hall.
At the hall setup I totally pushed too hard. I barely made it back to the hotel room to vomit some more. Then I switched rooms (so we could be apart the night before our wedding day), and tried to get to sleep as fast as possible.
My bff and I shared the room and we were both up by 5am. We ordered room service, I took a few bites (puked some more), and then we started the day.
So what if I vomited several more times?
So what if I couldn't actually EAT the catering?
So what if I couldn't let loose and drink some fun drinks?
I couldn't really eat, my Ankylosing Spondylitis pain was 9/10, I had to take several extra pills, I vomited a few times, and I needed to race to the washroom a few times, but it was such a minor part of the day that I could almost ignore it.
Almost.
Adrenaline got me through. Happiness got me through. Bliss got me through.
It was a perfect day - no matter what my health was doing!
The following days were much harder, having to use the wheelchair and struggling with nausea and energy, but all of it was worth it.
We got our perfect wedding day.
We had a TEAM of people surrounding us ready to help with anything. We had scores of people being more generous than anyone could ever ask for.
Our wedding started our marriage in the most wonderful way and we could not be happier.
P.S. There was only one dry eye in the room. I think every single person shed a few tears at some point. My brother's toast was the most emotional. He said something that I am not sure everyone understood. With a few funny comments and a great toast in general, he said: "I wasn't sure this day would ever come."
This wasn't a cliché. This had nothing to do with relationships, with dating, with getting married or ANYTHING. It had everything to do with not knowing if I would be ALIVE long enough to get married. We weren't sure I would ever see 30 years old. My health has always been such a question mark and, countless times, utterly volatile.
But I AM alive.
We ARE married.
And I survived the biggest day of our lives. The BEST day. And now we can enjoy every minute of our marriage - with all of the health challenges.