I have had some pretty intense insomnia lately.
Of course, like anyone, sometimes I stay up too late on purpose... I get caught up in a tv show, I browse social media, I stay up reading long past the point of becoming tired...but lately it has been all over the place.
I am too overheated, my pain is too high and I simply cannot get comfortable, I am thinking too much or have too many things to do, or I am just not tired. I stare at the ceiling, I very literally drum my fingers on the bed in musical patterns. If it is really bad, I will just give in and get up and do something productive.
The last few days though, wow, I have been out-of-it, emotional, drained, even lightheaded. Then when I try to sleep - NOTHING! I sit there and cry because all I want to do is have a restful night's sleep, but my body or mind or something is preventing it.
Right now for instance: I spent 2 and 1/2 hours tossing and turning. Wired. I can barely keep my eyes CLOSED! So I try writing. I try listening to spa music. I try everything. I even try medication to help me sleep! Now it is after 4am, so I know that the rest of this Saturday is going to be even tougher than the Friday was! I am going to feel emotional and pissed off and like a zombie. All day. I want to punch a wall! I want to cry! I want some goddamn rest!
What do you do when your body absolutely refuses to allow you to sleep?
oh that is the worst! you probably feel like you're going insane. i just lay there when i can't sleep. sometimes i try melatonin or meditation but often nothing works. feeling for you.
ReplyDelete