I came across the following quote on social media, and it truly 'hit the nail on the head'.
One of the most frustrating things that happens to those who deal with chronic illness, is that many other people do NOT believe you and treat you as though you are faking being ill or 'scamming' the system.
Now, in my opinion, this point of view can be partially blamed on those who ARE dishonest - who fake being ill either for money or attention - and take advantage of the kindness of others.
The above quote is obviously regarding Depression, but it ABSOLUTELY spans across all invisible illnesses, at any severity.
If an individual is constantly questioned and doubted regarding their health, it becomes a life-long struggle to always prove to others that he/she is, in fact, ill, and not pretending to be ill.
What happens when you constantly criticize and doubt - causing someone to feel as though it is necessary to prove the validity of his/her health problems?
You end up with this odd and unnecessary conversation, where the ill individual is continually telling you about some of the awful things that he/she experiences. It winds up sounding as though the individual is defending his/her status as a sick person, and can often come off as bragging or being proud or trying to one-up someone based on negative experiences, not positive experiences.
Following that, of course, comes the accusation: "You sound as though you WANT to be sick", or "you are so negative"...
Unfortunately, this discredits any or all of the pain and suffering, the uphill battles, and all of the days that this person FOUGHT to keep a positive attitude.
If you push someone in a corner by frequently forcing a sick individual to prove to YOU that he/she is legitimately ill, it is bound to sound like complaining. It will sound negative and pessimistic and as though he/she wants to be viewed as being ill... When really, the intention is to dispel doubt and to avoid future nonsensical accusations.
Trust me when I tell you that I am not happy about being ill. I do not enjoy the way that I feel on a day-to-day basis. It is extremely disrespectful and hurtful to treat an ill individual with disbelief... And even more upsetting to require that person to prove his/her medical situation. Being treated as though all of the health complications are fabricated is one of the most alienating and gut-wrenching accusations.
We are already fighting several battles at once - internally, so the last thing that I want to do is focus on proving my illness to someone who doesn't even believe that I am sick in the first place... Who discredits every single negative medical experience I have had to endure.