There is a quote that I have come across over the last few years that really strikes a chord with me - "Be kind, for every single person is fighting a battle you know nothing about."
I have mentioned this sentiment before... In a society where we are constantly comparing ourselves to others in every possible way, pain and suffering is one of those comparisons that makes no sense. We all do it, of course, and I am so guilty of this that it is almost embarrassing. If we come across someone who has an acute case of bronchitis, for example, and then come across someone who is battling throat cancer, we automatically think that the latter individual is feeling SO much worse than the previous, and that he/she is more deserving of our thoughts and good-wishes. In a way, that makes sense. Cancer is such an overwhelming diagnosis (not that other diagnoses are not overwhelming) that it is one of the most dreaded of just about all chronic and/or fatal conditions, BUT - pain and suffering is subjective. If bronchitis is the only infection that the first individual has experienced, then that particular pain IS, in fact, the worst pain that he/she has ever been through.
Every single person is or has been in debilitating pain - whether it be physical, emotional, or psychological. Just because a person is dealing with an illness that could be categorized as 'mild' does NOT improve his/her personal experience.
Pain sucks! Illness sucks!
Both of these statements are true regardless of the reason. For everyone.
I have recently been privileged to be involved in providing some music for hospital patients.
For as long as I can remember, I have always particularly wanted to bring music to children who are in the hospital. When we witness children having to remain in a health care facility, it evokes a universal feeling of tragic unfairness. Children have an innocence - there is nothing that they could have done in their short little lives that would warrant any kind of 'karma' or self-inflicted illness. (Then again - are there people at ANY age of ANY circumstance who deserve to be ill? You be the judge). In my experience, the vast majority of people who want to help those who are experiencing exceptional suffering, gravitate towards wanting to help small children, or the elderly. In both of these extremes, patients can rarely perform tasks on their own. These classes of patients are unable to help themselves - so the amount of care that is required is SO extensive that many individuals are jumping at the opportunity to help.
What about those people who are bound to a hospital bed who are not elderly and are not small children?
The overlooked.
This is an issue that has recently come to my attention.
I have the luxury of living at home, of maintaining much of my independence, as well as having the understanding of my own medical situation. On any given day of the week, I can plan to go and see a live band. If I want to go to a new movie that has just been released, I can easily buy tickets and make my way over to a movie theatre.
There are FAR too many people who are confined to a hospital room, hospital bed, and in hospital gowns. Many of these individuals have to be in a hospital for months on end, even years. Despite all of that, there are far fewer people who jump at the opportunity to help those who are not in the two extreme categories. Does that mean that they should be overlooked?
Anyone confined to a hospital cannot simply plan a night out and experience the culture and the joys of events in the world outside. For anyone confined to a hospital, live music (or Bingo nights, or newly released movies, special dinners, dinner parties, visits with friends, etc...) must all be brought TO these patients.
Entertainment that is brought into a hospital, given a choice to provide music for children with a life-threatening illness OR providing music for a person in his/her forties (for example) battling a life-threatening illness, which option would you choose?
I know what my answer used to be...
In future, my answer might be different because of recent experiences.
It is absolutely tragic for a child to be seriously ill, but is it not tragic for patients who are between the ages of 18-50 (per se) to be seriously ill?
Bringing music and joy to any person who is suffering is monumentally rewarding... And since there are SO many volunteers and caregivers dedicated to improving the quality of life for hospice patients and young children, there are millions of patients who are, in a sense, overlooked.
The gratitude and the enjoyment of live music can be seen in their smiles.
While giving a helping hand to children or elderly patients who are suffering, please take an extra minute to consider passing that help onto the age group that is so often ignored... Forgotten... Overlooked.
We all experience suffering... We all deserve people in our midst who are willing, and wanting, to help improve our lives, even in the slightest way.
Above all:
Be kind.