With health you have to pick your battles. Every choice you make has positive results AND negative results. You just have to choose which results you are going to focus on.
Every medication has adverse side effects. ALL OF THEM.
Yep. That sucks. But what they can do for people with chronic illness can be amazing. Sometimes the adverse side effects get worse and the positive effects do not improve... so you move on to the next potential treatments. Usually, with a progression of a disease, the treatments bear harsher side effects - greater risks - and there is never a guarantee.
There is no guarantee it will work at all.
If it does work, there is no guarantee how long it will help.
There is no guarantee that you will go into remission, and no guarantee how long any remission may last.
There is no guarantee that the adverse side effects will be mild.
There is no guarantee that you can handle or control the adverse effects.
And, most frighteningly, there is NO guarantee that adverse effects will disappear once you change treatments.
So - pick what you are going to fight for and do so with conviction. All you can do is make the best possible decision and go with it - because sometimes there is no going back.
I have a chance to feel better. Not by a lot, but by enough for ME. The other alternative is to continue as is, or watch it get worse. This decision could make things worse... it could change nothing... but it COULD make things better. It is a possibility.
So instead of sitting back - I am going to fight for a better quality of life while I still HAVE a potential option.
I am terrified.
But it could also change a lot of things in my life if it does happen to help even the slightest bit.
Deep breath.