Well, this weekend coming up is an exciting one. The MOST exciting. We are getting MARRIED this weekend!!!
As I am sitting here getting my nails done for the big day, after just coming back from the pharmacy, I am attempting to de-stress a bit today.
Life with chronic illness means that it pervades every single day. I don't get to ask for my illnesses to leave me alone for one of THE most important days of my life, and I know that. It's part of the package. There are things that are more in my control though; things like medications. My job is to ensure that I have enough to get me through this next week.
Except there's also an issue with that.
I thought I had refills available at the pharmacy, but I found out this morning that that wasn't the case. My doctor's office squeezed me in for a prescription refill appointment.
More bad news.
Apparently, I am going to have to switch doctors because of my pain issues. I am required to seek a new GP within a specific network - on the opposite side of the city. (If anyone has any recommendations of physicians in the NW, please let me know!). She did say that she would keep me on until I found a replacement, but she is no longer capable of changing doses or prescribing specific medications. It is beyond the scope of her allowed responsibilities. She also mentioned that she disagrees with the new rules, but, nevertheless, they are the rules. When we come back from the wedding and mini-moon, I will start searching for a new physician.
Then we got to the prescription.
Again, bad news.
She had to date the prescription for the 25th of September.
I run out of the medication on the 21st. So the 22nd (our wedding day) I would not have any medication to control my pain (or any day after that until we come back on the 26th-27th).
How is this okay?
Luckily, we found out TODAY. That means that I can force myself to be in excruciating pain today, tomorrow, Wednesday, and Thursday, so that I can save those doses for our big day. It means that I have to ration my medication just so that I can take the edge off on our Wedding Day and minimoon.
That's all I can do.
I have no power.
I have no real control.
They don't see what my days are like without medication. They don't understand what it means or see how it affects every part of my body and, subsequently, every part of my life.
BUT - I do have options.
I will skip my full doses for the next few days so that I can take my full dose on Saturday - to be comfortable on a day we were already nervous about.
We weren't sure how I was going to make it through the day already - but with no meds? Yikes.